i am in bed, watching tv, ON THE COMPUTER, listening to music, and eating a healthy snack all at once. my life is complete. i can now live without leaving my room. not that im home much anyway, but when i am its usually locked in here.
i went to hershey over the weekend, SENIOR CUT DAY 09'.
it was good stuff actually. i had a really great time with kristina & aileen<3
its actually really bothering me that people are still unhappy with me over nothing. i want to vow to never be honest again. because honesty means nothing, to everyone. still gets you nowhere, might as well give everyone what they want to hear. fuck it.
went with andrew to get a tux today. it was nice, but i still dont want to go. at all.
this weekend i have to work the health fair at my school, from early in the morning, until 2 in order to pass gym. FUCK SCHOOL FUCK GYM FUCK FUCK FUCK.
i cant believe morano did this to kristina and i. yeah, we've slacked. but really? 10-2 at the health fair? WHY?
started to make friends from ringling via facebook today; found a girl i actually really like. could be a good thing. im nervous as it is, seeing as though im going without knowing anyone, so is she.
i wanted to be asleep an hour ago, but that didnt happen obviously;
i am really tired.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Monday, May 18, 2009
so ive been spending a lot more time in my room lately than usual. i never realized how much i actually enjoy relaxing in it.
my knees are really badly bruised, and its most uncomfortable :( hindering this relaxation a little seeing as though everytime i curl up on my bed i twitch in pain. (thanks william.)
ive been really moody lately. cant tell if its because of my recent family wars or im just getting fed up from a lot of shit. ive actually gotten lazy to a point where i cant be bothered with making an effort to talk to anyone i dont see on a day to day basis. not for any reason, it simply does not cross my mind to do so.
gas is getting too expensive for my liking and i have too many expenses coming up. im not driving anyone anymore.
prom is nearing, and im not looking forward to it. i literally do not want to go at all.
and im getting fat, fuck.
i have successfully pulled off the greatest maneuver of all time, that i will forever feel triumphant over.
i'm actually really happy, and although nothing extravagant has been going on, everything is swell and i have 0 complaints.
so now i will drink the rest of my fruit punch and get some shut eye!
hopefully if all goes well i will get to have a temporary laptop from billy along with the gift of a wireless adapter from corey by friday, so i can finally enjoy the pleasure and comfort of having a computer in bed with me. yaaaay<3
peace.
my knees are really badly bruised, and its most uncomfortable :( hindering this relaxation a little seeing as though everytime i curl up on my bed i twitch in pain. (thanks william.)
ive been really moody lately. cant tell if its because of my recent family wars or im just getting fed up from a lot of shit. ive actually gotten lazy to a point where i cant be bothered with making an effort to talk to anyone i dont see on a day to day basis. not for any reason, it simply does not cross my mind to do so.
gas is getting too expensive for my liking and i have too many expenses coming up. im not driving anyone anymore.
prom is nearing, and im not looking forward to it. i literally do not want to go at all.
and im getting fat, fuck.
i have successfully pulled off the greatest maneuver of all time, that i will forever feel triumphant over.
i'm actually really happy, and although nothing extravagant has been going on, everything is swell and i have 0 complaints.
so now i will drink the rest of my fruit punch and get some shut eye!
hopefully if all goes well i will get to have a temporary laptop from billy along with the gift of a wireless adapter from corey by friday, so i can finally enjoy the pleasure and comfort of having a computer in bed with me. yaaaay<3
peace.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
THESE GIRLS
Monday, May 4, 2009
the future freaks me out
it hasnt occurred to me how intimidated i am by the idea of college. i feel like ive gotten so used to telling everyone and talking about where im going that i hadnt thought much into it. so heres a blog topic: i am scared of college.
i have been really excited about it, and dont get me wrong, i am, but i am leaving so much behind. doesnt really seem like a big deal to be away from home, but i think about how long months can be, and think how i wont be seeing my family for months. that scares me. ive never had that kind of independence. im scared. im scared of leaving the people and things i love. i have never realized what an impact every thing and person has made in my life and am intimidated by the thought of losing them or being separated from them. im going to miss my best friends so much, and im afraid of what ill do when im sad. granted i will make new friends, but none of them will KNOW me, like know how to comfort me. nobody will be able to remind me of good times or bring me my favorite stuff to cheer me up. i cant just call one of my friends and say hey come over im bummed. nobody will be there. i wont be able to do my favorite things, ill have to find new ones. this is really overwhelming im getting myself upset.
i know im ready, but i just dont feel ready.
there are really important people to me that im going to miss, and the thought of not having enough time left scares me. im not ready to let go of my life. i like the way things are going.
i am obviously freaking out.
oyyy :'(
i have been really excited about it, and dont get me wrong, i am, but i am leaving so much behind. doesnt really seem like a big deal to be away from home, but i think about how long months can be, and think how i wont be seeing my family for months. that scares me. ive never had that kind of independence. im scared. im scared of leaving the people and things i love. i have never realized what an impact every thing and person has made in my life and am intimidated by the thought of losing them or being separated from them. im going to miss my best friends so much, and im afraid of what ill do when im sad. granted i will make new friends, but none of them will KNOW me, like know how to comfort me. nobody will be able to remind me of good times or bring me my favorite stuff to cheer me up. i cant just call one of my friends and say hey come over im bummed. nobody will be there. i wont be able to do my favorite things, ill have to find new ones. this is really overwhelming im getting myself upset.
i know im ready, but i just dont feel ready.
there are really important people to me that im going to miss, and the thought of not having enough time left scares me. im not ready to let go of my life. i like the way things are going.
i am obviously freaking out.
oyyy :'(
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